Do Better Thursday: I Haz A Cold

Damn, Cold/Flu bug caught me slippin’ but The Movement must roll along…

DC almost caught the return of Snowmageddon… but it couldn’t measure up… it looks more like a Snow Poop… it’s not pretty at all… 
Anyway…
Let’s Get To It…
DOING IT RIGHT!!!
  • A&E revives prisoners attempt to save lives with Beyond Scared Straight… So far, only 2 episodes have premiered and it’s already become a hit in my household at least…  I’m not sure if my 1-bedroom condo is considered a “household” because it’s only holding* me… Back to the subject… One word: Diabla …I’m still not sure if she was/is a woman… I really thought this was where “Beyond Scared Straight” meets “Punk’d”… and someone was going to come out and exclaim “WELCOME TO JAIL, LADIES!!! WE EVEN LET MEN IN HERE SOMETIMES!!!” Now, I’m not even sure that the show will help scare other kids from jail… 1, because it comes on at 10PM… and 2, it’s on A&E… but it damn sure is keeping me from going out here and thieving… 
“YOU WANT SOMMA DIS OLD MAN!?!” …”No!”
  • 8 year olds do some cool new dance… or old dance… I’m not sure of the timeline with krumpin’… just that MADTV used to do a pretty funny skit on it… It feels likes just 2 decades ago I was in their circle… and now… all they do is make me feel old… Enjoy…
These young scraps don’t have nothing on my old man bop… (<—– when did I get here…)
  • Kaing Obama drops the future rap hook for the hottest songs soon to come… Get ready for a huge summer… Remember when Swizz sampled every Jay-Z line known to man… and made hits with them… Get ready for Barack on your iPods with “WE DO BIG THINGS!!!” 
Baddest man on the planet…

ON THE FENCE…
  • Flava Flav opens a fried chicken and rib shop... I couldn’t think of a clever lead-in… I think “Flava Flav opens a fried chicken and rib shop” says enough… This could have been in the “Doing It Wrong” category… but truly… anyone getting money legally and morally correct is quite alright with me… and truthfully, this is the natural progression of Flava Flav… it only makes sense that he’s doing this… It’s much better than his endeavor of finding love on VH1… and I don’t recall there being much of a backlash when Kenny Rogers opened up Rotisserie Chicken shops… So, why should we have one for a brother bringing flava to the coup… I’m just happy the ONE shop is in Iowa versus DC… because I’m not sure if I’d be able to withstand the temptation of another fried chicken interpretation… I’m quite sure if asked did I want to go get a bucket of Flava Flava chicken… I’d have to reply… “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH BOIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!” 😦
Couldn’t even replace the Long John Silvers banner, Flav??? 

DOING IT WRONG!!!
  • Toyota makes innocent kid appear Douchey… Initially, when I decided to speak on this… I was going to go after the kid… much like a person who goes after the mistress / other man as opposed to addressing the significant other… So, Toyota or whomever they hired to come up with this Highlander promotion is to blame for this Douchey ass kid… Outfitted in the latest hipster attire… Skinny jeans, buttoned-up-to-the-top demin jean shirt, leather jacket with hood and hair that don’t care… Prances around his folks new van while showing up other kids “less fortunate” in the cool car department… There are several issues with this… The main one being will parents stake car payments on the advice of a pre-teen… Another, is the car even cool??? Lastly, fuck you douchey ass kid… I don’t mind riding around in my pops Brown Beatle… and I’m talking Bug Beatle… the old one… the one where you can hear your ride coming 4 blocks away… The one where the heat was regulated by the opening and closing of a vent… and NOT a temperature control setting… The one with the engine in the back… and the trunk in the front… The one without power steering fluid… DO YOU KNOW HOW TOUGH THAT IS LEARN HOW TO DRIVE ON!!! *wait…* I made this personal… My bad…
FUCK YOU TOYOTA!!!

THIS IS HOW COOL KIDS RIDE!!! SHOUT OUT TO MY 6th GRADE SELF!!!

Well, let me go get some tea for this cold… 
…thanks for reading… and doing better…
– dre’ of onustees.com 

One response to “Do Better Thursday: I Haz A Cold

  1. I thought the same damn thing when I watched Beyond Scared Straight. No lie, I thought that they'd hired a guy to pretend to be a girl and at the end they'd reveal it to the audience…Then she said she had a daughter too. You could tell that it was her "feminine side" talking. It was supposed to be a heartfelt moment. For me I just kept thinking, "What man laid with you?"

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